pointless deadly teen drama

I have to warn you though, that high doses of this stuff can do things to you. The other day, I took a lot. I had some in the early AM, and then redosed, which is stupid. Even with it feeling like I was sober, redosing shot me to some level I wasn’t even ready for. I knew this would happen, but I thought I could handle it. I started throwing up at one point, and my wife helped me into the bathroom and was trying to undress me so I could get in the shower. I thought a “simulation” was playing in my head, which is very common for me. Not thinking something is a simulation, but having fake things happen when I drift off. For whatever fucking reason, the way I chose to prove to myself that this wasn’t real was to hit my wife. I’ll say that again in case you don’t understand. I WAS SO HIGH I THOUGHT IT WAS A GOOD IDEA TO PUNCH MY WIFE IN THE BACK OF THE NECK TO PROVE THAT WHAT I WAS EXPERIENCING WAS NOT REAL. I felt/feel like fucking shit. I’ve never hit anyone before. I’ve never even been in a fight.

I came to god knows how much longer, and my wife is on the couch with a knife. I ask what she’s doing, and she tells me I hit her. I have no memory of it at this point. When I heard what I had done I was fucking devastated. Nothing has ever had this affect on me, or made me look at my drug use this way.

I’m not trying to paint DXM in a bad light. I had some awesome times on it, and it can be fucking magical. But, don’t be an idiot like me and over do it.